Good Morning Gorgeous,

It’s a brand new day. A fresh new start. A new day to rise and just release every care over to Jesus.

I know this sounds cliche, like just words you say to encourage someone in hard times.  “Just trust Jesus.”

I know trusting Jesus fully with all aspects of every single area of our life is hard.

I know releasing worry, fear, and control is sometimes a minute by minute battle.

So when I share about placing your trust in Jesus, I am fully aware that its hard, its scary, it feels impossible at times, and it has to be done again and again.

I can also share that trusting Jesus is a choice and not a feeling. I share that with humility and from my own experiences with the depths of great loss, traumatic events, and a life that’s been completely destroyed and then recreated from ashes.

And trusting Jesus didn’t necessary feel warm and fuzzy in all seasons and even though I can fully and confidently say He has ALWAYS been there, and even though He has never let me down, I STILL struggle with doubt. Yes, I still doubt Him. But I have learned to TELL HIM when I am feeling doubt and allow Him to work in my places of darkness, doubt, fear, or struggle. And He has always been faithful, always.

So, here is the conversation I had with God today. He doesn’t speak this clearly to me everyday. But today, He did. 

Side note, God desires to speak with you. He sent His Holy Spirit to the earth to dwell in the hearts of anyone who places their trust and faith in Jesus. So when you gave your life to Christ, you now have access to hear His voice. And He has ALOT to say to those who lean in to hear.

Here’s what it looks like for me…. just gonna be real here…

I pulled into my driveway after having finished dropping all 5 kids off at 4 different schools. I have about 3 hours before I need to start making my rounds picking everyone back up. This is my only 3 hours to myself all week. Wednesdays from 10 to 1:30, and it’s always a struggle how I will spend it. Do I clean the house? Do I work on my shop baskets? Start a meal for dinner that requires alot of prep work? Read my Bible? Write? Sit and spend time just talking to Jesus?

Its ALL good stuff, but with three hours, I have to pick just a few things from the list. This is my only chance to have options over my time until next Wednesday.

As I got out of the car, I said, “Lord, direct my steps when I walk into the house. Show me what You want me to do today.”

I walked in and I wanted to eat. I hadn’t had breakfast yet, but I felt an urge to start my time off in prayer instead. So I skipped the kitchen, and knelt down to pray.

I began to pray and I started to talk with Jesus about trust. I told Him that I trusted Him, and asked Him to help me to grow in trust. I began to think about how all day long we can use worry as a catapult to just speak back to it, ” I trust Jesus.”

A problem arises at work, just say, “I trust You with this Jesus.”

Bad news comes, and we respond with, ” I trust You Jesus.”

I began to imagine that for women of God just boldly speaking to every curveball and firey arrow, “I trust Jesus with this and this too and that as well.”

Just a few moments in to my prayers and my own wandering thoughts on trust and  my dog Junior came over and plopped down next to me.

I turned to him and began to pet him. I was already in a posture of prayer, so I began to thank God for Junior. I was petting him and rubbing his belly and praying, “Thank You Lord for this dog. Thank You for blessing me with him. Thank You for keeping Your promises and faithfully walking with me through searing pain and deep loss.”

You see Junior came after I watched in horror as my dog Maxwell got hit by a car when he ran straight into a busy road while we were ministering to a homeless camp. In the weeks after it happened, I would get on my knees alone in my bathroom and sob, “I trust You Jesus. I still trust You Jesus. I know You are good. I know You are for me. I know You are the only One who can touch this pain and heal it.”

And so this morning, about 8 months after the accident, as I pet Junior who is Maxwell’s little brother, I was overcome with gratitude that Jesus had given me this precious pup. And as I prayed to Jesus my prayers of gratitude, I asked Him a question..

“Jesus, will I really see Maxwell again one day in heaven? I still miss him so much. Will I really get to see him again?” I heard in my spirit, “Yes daughter, you will.”

I asked God back,”How is that possible? Should I even get my hopes up on that one? Petting him again is too amazing to even imagine” I felt God again, “Daughter, is anything impossible for Me? What seems impossible on earth is plausible in heaven, even common sometimes.”

Wow, I felt a sense of peace. Jesus heard me and He took the time to speak with me.

But can we be real again? I doubted that it was really Him….

Do you ever hear from God like that and doubt that it was His voice? We are humans. We are not too holy to struggle with doubt in what we think we are hearing.

So I sat there in peace kinda wondering…. “Was that really You God? Can I cling to that Word as a promise?”

But God in His mercy and faithfulness met me in my doubt. As I continued to sit in this space of half prayer, half pondering… my eyes caught a stack of boxes. Inside each one were canvas prints. I grabbed the top one to look inside and this is what it said!

I KNEW right then and there my conversation with God was real and that He sees me, He hears me, and His promise to me will come to pass.

We can quote scripture, teach about Jesus, say all the religious things, but what following Jesus is REALLY about is the amazing fact that HE DESIRES to be in relationship and communicate with us.

He wants to be in relationship with us where we actually talk to each other. That was the precious mark of our holy inheritance! The indwelling of God’s own spirit inside of us, so we can access God through the righteousness of Jesus Christ.

The gospel message is that we are no longer separated by God because of sin, and instead can speak with Him in reverence and expect to hear Him speak back to us!

There’s two beautiful truths I pray you take away from my testimony today.

First, All day long you can receive the peace of Christ by declaring right into any obstacle, “I choose to trust Jesus with this.”

On hard days, you may declare your trust in Jesus hundreds of times. BUT darkness has to flee when you choose trust over fear, anxiety, worry, hopelessness, and any other idol that sets itself above God’s total provision in our life.

And second, you can talk to God and expect Him to respond to you. It may be in a multitude of different ways that He speaks. An impression on your heart, a song on the radio, a friend, a scripture, or even a canvas print in a box.

If you have trouble hearing Him, tell Him that too. “Lord, I want to hear Your voice over all other voices in my life.”

Keep praying and then listen, He will speak in a way that you know it’s Him.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You Lord that You speak to us! Thank You for making a way to remove sin , so that we can be in communion with You, our Holy God, even when we are so unholy. Thank You for making us holy through the righteousness of Jesus Christ and counting our faith in Christ as righteousness. Thank You for Your mercy, Your grace, Your goodness, and Your faithfulness through EVERY season of our lives. We trust You. We desire to trust You even more. Lord, help us to hear Your voice and to recognize it as Yours alone. Remove the doubt that it’s our own voice or our imagination and reveal to us when it’s YOU speaking a word right into our spirits.

In Jesus’s Name, Amen.

May you be covered in Blessing and have ears primed for His voice,

Vanessa Lynn